Just not cricket, bye bye miss South American pie

We knew a three hour wait at customs crossing the border to Argentina was coming. That we could handle. But when your bus has finally made it to the front of the queue at 3am and your bus breaks down. That is just not cricket. High atop the Andie's, it's cold, it's dark, and the two bit shack that doubled as a cafe were manned by grumpy old men. Let's just say instead of arriving at six, our bus strolled in at Santiago at eleven am missing Beth's jumper and sunglasses.

As the capital of the strongest economy on the Continent, Santiago boasts all the trimmings of western life, but all the architectural beauty of it's colonial past, superb food and wine, and although often clouded by smog, the Andi's and the coast. I doubt any Australian would experience any culture shock here.

Winding down we visited the usual suspects of tourist destinations, markets, art galleries, museums, and the shopping districts by foot, bus, and the ever reliable and extensive subway.

Random Chilean notes
* High standard of living
* Steak and wine in the centre and north
* Patagonian lamb in the south
* Fish all olver
* Extensive national parks with exceptional beauty in the South
* Sensational empanadas mirroring that of Chile
* Obvious scars of a difficult political past
* A pleasant and mostly safe city

Random South American notes
* All stores are overstaffed but service is generally slow
* Siesta - Anywhere from one hour to five hours a day
* A love of the world game
* Love of pizza with little signs of McDonald's or Hungary Jacks especially up North
* Driving - Dangerous, no indicators nor seat belts
* Excellent and cheap Internet, especially in Bolivia and Argentina
* Street vendors.... food, clothes, and various oddities
* The chariot of the people... the humble bus
* Everyone knows kangaroos, Sydney, and Melbourne and are always pleased to know you're Australian
* The Police and lots and lots of Bob Marley
* Lack of respect for Zebra crossings in the Andie's
* Pashing in public
* Although frowned upon, the odd male relieving themselves in the street
* Very, very, very inferior hot water systems
* Croissants for Breakfast
* Dinner starts at around 8 in the Andie's and anytime between 9 and 12 in the Southern cone

Dodgiest experiences
* 12 hour trip to the jungle, Cliff hugging buses, rally driving taxi, and motorised canoe
* Beth ordering fish heads
* The Blue House hostel in Punta Arenas
* Slobodan Milosovic in El Chalten trying to charge us double for our room, then asking where we're from as to add us to the disallowed list of citizens allowed to stay
* Hostels in Amsterdam
* Iberian airways
* Worlds most dangerous road
* During a break white water rafting, jumping from the cliffs into the shallow water

South America, sure it's a bit rougher than the normal route, but with amazing and changing natural bueaty, friendly and culturally diverse populations, and the gastronomical delights, get here anyway you can.

Next stop, a Tahititian beach

A magnificent comeback and food, glorious food

After the last earthquake around a hundred years ago, the city fathers rebuilt Mendoza with and leafy streets, footpaths and parks to provide a haven from the trembling roofs of the yet to come earthquake, which is now a picture perfect city. A temperate climate, surrounding glacial mountains, and a humming adventure scene only add to the reasons why it is a tourist hotspot.

Random Argentinian Notes
- A diet of steak, steak, and more steak with the odd pizza or pasta.
- The only salads available are what I call boys salads... Lettuce, Tomato, and a maybe a bit of carrot or onion
- Fascination with where you are from
- Cheap and reasonable quality wines
- Try the lamb in patagonia
- Climate and culture of food, wine, and beers of the Centre and North make for a gut expanding few weeks
- Awe inspiring beauty, from gacliers, to moutains, to waterfalls, to rolling plans... Argentina has it all
- A country full of potential AFL recruits. Everyone, especially woman walk in straight lines, never giving an inch to oncoming paedestrians
- Almost obsessive patriotism towards the Islas Malvinas (Falkland Islands)
- Cost of living is about a third of that in Australia
- Booming mens magazines industry "We only buy them for the articles"
- Massive bank queues. Literally at least 50 people lined up at any one time
- Price fixing and corruption
- Argentinians are often nicknamed "Che" for their pronounciation of 'll' as 'ch' instead of 'y'

Wierd and wonderful foods of the last four months
Cuy (Guinea Pig)
Alpaca (Peru)
Lama (Peru)
Beaver (Patagonia)
Krill (Patagoinia)
Ants licked fresh of the tree (Ecuadorian jungle)
Raw Ox mince sandwich (Netherlands)
Parillada (Argentina - Cheap, cheap bbq cuts of meat... liver, intestines, tripe, blood sausage)
Water reeds (Peru)
Pancho (Chile - Hot dog covered with guacamole)
Empanadas (Argentina - Pastry turnovers)
Herrings (Netherlands)
South American, especially Bolivia street food
Fish heads (Hong Kong)
Black Sesame (HK)

Favourite dishes
Paella (Spain)
Tapas (Spain)
Herrings (Hollands)
Bife de Chirizo (Argentinian steak)
Alpaca (Andies)
Cuy (Peru)
Cerviche (Peruvian pickled seafood)

Cheap cuts of meats, a city deserted, and cama baby

Identifying Cordoba as the cultural capital of South America, it seemed like the ideal destination to drown our soon to be South American departing sorrows and ring in the new year. This student mecca, boasting seven universities and some fine architecture produced three days out of four of deserted streets and unexpected and unwanted peace and quiet.... Well, atleast except for new years.

Cracking of evening at a traditional argentinian parilla (meathouse) serving the the quintesential guacho meal of parillada, a large severing of cheapest of bbq meats accompanied by bottomless copa de vino, we were set. Unfortunatly, this celebrated cooking technique did little to enhance the flavour of the tripe, kidneys, livers, and intestines on offer. Then again, upon leaving with three drops of fine argentinian drops under our belts, our spirits were raised as we headed back to the orphanage to raise the flag for the aussies till around 5am.

A pleasant change to the often dull scene of museums was the a short stop at Che Guevarra´s child hood home with a nice mixture of photo´s, nic nacks, multimedia, personal items.



Although quality and safety vary greatly in South American road travel, one general rule applies. Why obey the rules if know one else is?

The chariot of the people
Andian buses hit the dirt roads, pavement, climb mountain high and valley low, and generally collect a few dozen padestrians each year. Sitting behind the driver and travelling at night reduce the shock of looking of 100 metre cliffs inches from the tires, oncoming traffic, and the often near misses of animals, kids, and cars. Fortunatly, you´ll always get atleast one 80´s van Damme or Wayanns bro flick to fill the time and street vendors randomly jumping on the moving vehicle hawking their wares.

Southern Cone buses on the otherhand are reliable, cheap, and often luxurious. Two classes are on offer: Semi cama, the equivalent of business class, and Cama, the equivalent of first class for aboutr $5 more. Well worth the cash. Meals and movies are always on offer, generally with english audio.

Taxi´s
Everywhere, anywhere... Indicators, lanes, and rules all bow to the power of the horn. Signalling 1) your turn in the queue 2) Attracting customers 3) Displaying the finger 4) Displaying displeasure at the 20 minute traffic jam and 5) Saying hi to one of the lady padestrians.

Driving
Slightly saving the lunacy is that practically all streets are one way.... Considering how everyone drives, it must save tens of thousands of lives a year. Adelaide needs it, Australia needs it, hell, the UN should mandate it.